Don’t count me with the rest!

29

Mar

I have recently read/heard a lot of things via the internet and my friends, about things all guys should know about girls. The problem with all of this is, they are incredibly incorrect on some of these things — that is if they are adding me to that list of girls. So, I decided to be a bit comical and list my contradictory likings. Let’s get started, eh?

• If I am angry or upset with you, kissing me is not the solution. In fact, it will probably make me even more upset.
• If you notice me looking at your lips, it is not me wishing I were kissing you; I am observing your speech.
• I don’t prefer hugs from behind. No, actually, I would rather hear your heart beat and be able to hug you back.
• You don’t have to empty your wallet on flowers for me; I will be just as pleased (if not more) with hand-picked flowers.
• I really don’t care if you are obsessed with video games. I’ll even go a step further. I wouldn’t mind being offered the chance to play video games with you every once-and-a-while.
• I won’t think you are cheating on me if you don’t call. I love talking to you, but I do understand that you have a life and responsibilities.
• I would happily make you a sandwich, but you might want to be sweet about it. After-all, you have no idea what’s on that thing.
• I know that I am not the only female on Earth, and I am okay with you having friends that are girls.
• I understand that you have bad days too; you don’t have to act like you can handle everything. I won’t lose it.
• I can handle hearing the truth; it’s better to hear it from you than later on from someone else.
• There’s a difference between having low self-esteem, and being modest.
• I’m not sensitive on the obvious truth that I take far too long to get ready; it won’t upset me if you make fun of me (like I probably deserve).
• I won’t complain if you understand what I am thinking and feeling when I don’t openly admit it.
• Being cheesy is not attractive. You can be simple and creative without being cheesy. I have faith in you!
• If my hair is curly, please don’t play with my hair. You want my hair to look nice, but curls turn into frizz when they are messed with.
• A nighttime trip to the beach beats expensive dates any day.
• I don’t expect you to buy everything for me.
• I love when I guy is protective, but threatening every guy I speak to will get you nowhere.
• Don’t assume that I will react like the other girls you’ve dated.
• Don’t tell me I look great when I don’t; just let me know that you’ll take me the way I am (of course, only if you really will!).
• If I ask your opinion on something, it isn’t always a loaded question. Keyword: always. I would be lying if I said that loaded questions didn’t exist. My advice? Learn to decipher them.
• I don’t want you to let me win in board/card/video games.
• Realize that I have a sense of independence. Be there for me, but don’t take my free will away from me.
• I am not under the delusional spell that I am the only female you will find attractive. That being said, you don’t have to announce it to me when you see a girl you think is hot. Keep it to yourself and I will keep my comments about hot guys to myself (minus movie stars/musicians/etc. on all accounts).
• I don’t need you to always watch a chick flick with me. I have no problems with machine guns, large explosions, and unrealistic action sequences.
• If I am crying during a movie, I don’t need your shoulder or hand. It isn’t like I will deny it, by any means, but it isn’t required.
• You can smell good without cologne. It’s called soap. (most of this probably has to do with the fact that I am allergic to most perfumes and cologne…)
• Chocolate won’t make everything better.
• If I ask for any space, physically, it isn’t because I hate you; it’s because I’m claustrophobic.
• All girls aren’t crazy over large muscles.
• Just because I’m whispering to a friend when you’re around, doesn’t always mean I’m talking about you.

This was longer than expected, but hey, I’m special. 😀

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